A Certified Case of Ivory Abuse

There is nothing a piano likes more than to be abused. I love a piano. This is true and I will tickle the ivories all night long. I will stroke them and touch them lovingly and bring the melody forward. However, there is nothing those 88 keys like more than to be abused. A good session is one where at the end of it your knees are skinned up and there are blood stains on the ebony. A piano is magic and it is an animal and you must learn to love it and live as one with this Ivory toothed monster...and when you do, it will fulfill you.